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15.1 Making up for Lost Time

April 10, 2011

To me, it’s no secret.  Every day I’m fighting a battle with myself.

And I lose.

Lately, sitting in my sewing room just saddens me. (Of course, somehow, everything just saddens me lately)

The person assigned to make one set of my blocks completely ‘wigged out’ and even deleted herself from the swapping forum altogether, just before I decided to shoot her an e-mail to ask what was wrong, did she need more time, or more explanation on how to do the blocks, or what colors worked.

Gone.

Just like that.

I understand if something happened and suddenly there isn’t the time someone expected to have.

I’m not a monster. I would have understood something like that.

Instead, I was ‘stood up’.  Feeling foolish for being positive.

You know what I mean, don’t ya? The ‘waiting by the phone for someone to call’ feeling.

Anyway, I’ve decided that the blocks just aren’t coming.

So I am going to make up for lost time in make my own blocks.

To replace the ones I would have gotten.

I’ve got plenty of blues and reds.

And thanks to this swap

I have plenty oranges and yellows too.

These blocks look pretty, don’t they?  Well half pretty?  The ‘quarter triangles’ have to be ripped apart because they are sewn with arufil thread that is black and not ‘cream’.

My first arufil thread test worked pretty good.  But it was black.

So I bought some ecru / off white / something. Now I just have to use it.

4 comments

  1. Dear Darla, For some reason, the months of April and November are the most unhappy for me. I was a 2nd grade teacher for 36 years and I dreaded those 2 months. Oh Darla! I’ve been there, done that! Please, if you are not on anti-depressants, do it now. I suffered with depression for years and finally went on medication and it has made a world of difference. Think of it like diabetes. Yes, I have a medical issue that prevents me from processing food that “normal” people have no trouble processing. I need help. Should I go on medication or just suffer it out because I can’t admit I have a medical issue that it disrupting my whole being? Darla, do not hesitate. Make an appointment with a doctor. Also, the first medication may not be effective for a few weeks and another medication may be more effective. Don’t worry, it’s just a bump in the road. I’m anxious to hear of your new adventures. Darla, you are such a wonderful person. I LOVE your podcasts! Wendy from MN


  2. Sorry to hear you’re feeling sad. And that really sucks to have a swap partner flake on you. So rude!
    I hope you start cheering up soon and I’m looking forward to another podcast! Take care of yourself.


  3. Just want you to know that you are thought of. I also hope that your Easter weekend brings you a bit of cheer.


  4. Darla…
    I wish I could help! This is the kind of thing that time, chocolate, friends, patience can help. It is so hard when you just feel hard to even get out of bed, but you have little ones who have so much they ask of you. You don’t have the luxury of healing or even wallowing a little. Wallowing always helps me. In the “Lorilei Gilmore” fashion of junk food, TV and time.

    I think it just depends on what the issue is…for me, it is either crying it out in the shower, snuggling my babies while eating popcorn and watching a movie, or even cleaning my house.

    Sometimes…living in the now is the only way to get through the day. I know that sounds…odd, but I have to just live in the moment or it is just too hard to think beyond what do I have to do in the next ten minutes.

    I hope that you feel better. My heart aches for you!



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